Some stories are too well documented to ignore and too small to justify convening a grand jury. These are those stories.
LOCAL / TEMPORAL FITNESS
Area Resident Goes Back in Time to Before He Joined Planet Fitness
Membership cancellation still requires visiting the original timeline in person.
PUBLIC SERVICE
Hall & Oates Emergency Hotline Remains Nation’s Most Reliable Infrastructure
In a true emergency, every second counts. Fortunately, “Maneater” begins almost immediately.
CALLIN’ OATES719-266-2837719-26-OATES
EDUCATION / CURRICULUM
Denville First-Grade Reader Raises Unexpected Geopolitical Questions
Saddam Hussein is alive, well and apparently taking people to work at night.